


Harry Potter and the Boys that Deserved Better

by mymoon4ndstars



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: I'm Sorry, Inspired by Fanart, it's really only drarry but the other characters are there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-11
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:02:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27498397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mymoon4ndstars/pseuds/mymoon4ndstars
Summary: A look at some of Harry's thoughts and actions through the second half of DH, and a bit of a change to the Battle of Hogwarts.I won't lie it's a pretty sad fic, the character death warning is there for a reason.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter
Kudos: 15





	Harry Potter and the Boys that Deserved Better

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this fanart!! It's so beautiful and I just had to write something for it. It mostly follows/adapts canon until, well, you'll know when you get there.  
> https://kasjophe.tumblr.com/post/630089905408737280/harry-potter-and-the-boys-that-deserved-better
> 
> Also yeah I have a tumblr (again...), come find me at the same username as here, feel free to yell at me <3
> 
> I also have another fic that is a WIP, if you like this and want something a little more light hearted (at the moment at least)
> 
> Last but not least, while I was writing this, this song came on and oh boy it hit me in the feels, so I felt like I had to include it too.
> 
> And as the sun went down we ended up on the ground  
> I heard the train shake the windows  
> You screamed over the sound  
> And as we own this night  
> I'll put your body to the test with mine  
> This love was out of control  
> Three, two, one, where did it go?  
>  \- Hold On Til May - Pierce The Veil, Lindsey Stamey

Harry knew, now that he had had enough time running for his life with his best friend, that he was grateful in a way, that Cedric didn’t have to fight for him. All the people Harry and Hermione listen out for on Potterwatch, the familiar voices crackling through radio waves, listing families and individuals that were missing, or confirmed dead, made him think back to those that he had _already_ lost to the war. Cedric wasn’t the first one, his parents had that sombre achievement, but he was the first that really cemented the idea in Harry’s head. Voldemort was back, people were going to die, and there was nothing he could do about it but cry as he held Cedric’s cold, lifeless body in his arms afterwards.

Knowing what he did now, Harry looked back at his fourth year with bittersweet cynicism. His first real crush, that he had put on Cho, had died in front of him. Typical really, for the Boy Who Lived to have been head over heels for a dead boy. It explained why him and Cho never worked out with both of them mourning the Hufflepuff in their own ways, the girl who had waltzed with him, had been rescued by him in the second task - and the boy who jealously watched from afar and had unknowingly led him to his death.

Hermione could tell that Harry was distracted, had been since Godric’s Hollow, but just put it down to the things they had seen, had learned, and just barely survived. Harry knew that Hermione saw how slowly and angrily he did everything, how bitter he was about his wand, about Dumbledore, everything. He just couldn’t stop his thoughts from going back to that teenager, the same age as Harry is now, standing bravely in the face of death, protecting Harry. Of course, if he had lived he would have been in the Order, would have been out there every day risking his life, possibly even helping back in summer with the multiple Potter operation where they lost Moody. No, it was better that Cedric didn’t have to see the miserable place the world had become, Harry just wished he could have stopped it all from happening in the first place.

~

After Ron had returned to them, everything seemed to happen so quickly. Harry couldn’t believe they had been so stupid, so careless that they were now running from snatchers. All he could do was thank Hermione’s quick thinking with the stinging hex she sent his way just before they were caught.

Now they were in Malfoy Manor, Harry and Ron the only ones left after Dobby had whisked the other captives away to safety. Harry yet again couldn’t believe what was happening, as Pettigrew set them free, his silver hand turning on its owner to choke him for defying the monster that had given it to him. Harry was stood in shock, Ron already moving up through the manor to get back to Hermione, when something pulled him in that direction. He walked without thinking, his only purpose was to get closer to the voice that was shaking as it told Bellatrix to stop messing around, that clearly the girl wouldn’t tell them anything, to just leave her alone.

While Ron grabbed Hermione out of harm’s way, Harry rushed to Malfoy’s side, so many questions that he wanted to ask, wanted to scream at him, but he knew they didn’t have time, knew that it would just put Draco at even more risk. The blond gave him a nearly imperceptible nod and readily gave up his wand, and Harry was sure he had seen him reach towards him as Dobby disapparated with them.

Before Harry could even start to think about what it meant, Dobby was dying in his arms, sobs shaking the boy as he despaired. His poor friend, so misguided when they first met, and willingly putting his life at risk, willingly dying in order to save Harry’s life. The words he had spoken at the end of his second year rang through his head as Luna helped him with his small, fragile body - “Never try to save my life again.”

While Harry dug the grave for Dobby, he played back everything that had happened at the Manor. Draco hadn’t explicitly said that it wasn’t him, and after knowing each other since they were eleven, Harry could probably pick Draco out of a line-up blindfolded, so it was a definite choice on the blonds behalf to stay quiet. He had managed to stop Bellatrix in her torture of Hermione, Merlin knows what the witch might have done if she had continued. The word carved into his best friends arm was bad enough, but Harry knew that Bellatrix had no limits to the damage she would inflict. If they hadn’t had the opportunity they did, thanks to Draco, they probably would have been dead on the manor floor by now.

~

Harry’s heart leapt as he saw Draco with Crabbe and Goyle at the entrance to the Room of Requirement. He couldn’t explain why the sight of the blond made him so relieved, but he was. It wasn’t until Draco lifted his wand to point at Harry that he faltered, remembering what side of the war the young Death Eater was on. Harry realised as Draco’s eyes flitted around the room, that this must have been the room’s form when he spent so much time there the previous year. The vanishing cabinet might still be here somewhere, an eternal reminder of what - _who_ \- Draco had brought into the school.

The trio raced around the room, Ron and Hermione firing spells at the Slytherins, Harry just holding onto the diadem, wondering how they were going to destroy the thing, and what Draco thought he would achieve by chasing after them. All of a sudden, Ron came running back in Harry’s direction, shouting about Crabbe setting off fiendfyre. Red flames careened about in different shapes behind the towers of junk from where Ron had been only seconds before, confirming his screams of terror. Harry’s sole focus was to get out, get Ron and Hermione and get out. As they ran around a corner he spied some old broomsticks and grabbed Ron’s arm, who in turn pulled Hermione to them, the girl shaking her head in despair. Despite the imminent death chasing them, Harry couldn’t help but be filled with nostalgia, being flung back to their first year and flying together to get the winged key in Flitwick’s task.

As they flew through the room, avoiding flames and falling bric-a-brac, Harry’s gaze was caught by Draco and Goyle, climbing onto a tower of abandoned items, desperate to get away from the fiendfyre. Harry didn’t even think before turning around and flying down to reach for Draco, vaguely aware of Ron shouting at him, and the blond immediately threw his hand up to grab Harry’s forearm. Harry used the momentum from the speed of flying to pull Draco up onto the broom behind him, heart clenching as Draco’s arms wound themselves tightly around Harry’s waist.

Harry was relieved when they made it out relatively unscathed, until he noticed Draco kneeling at the entrance, watching in horror as the flames tore apart the room. He dropped the diadem, slowly moving towards Draco, putting a hand gently on his arm, grabbing his attention. Draco’s eyes were shining with unshed tears, just barely whispering “Vince” as Ron gave the diadem an almighty kick, sending it into the fire before the doors closed. Harry sympathetically patted Draco’s arm again, opening his mouth to - well he wasn’t really sure what he was going to say, but he was cut off by Voldemort. Harry’s scar shot through with pain, but before he could even think of what to do next, an angular face appeared in front of him.

“You can’t go to him Potter, you _can’t_.” Harry stared at Draco, the other boy shaking, whether out of fear or shock from what had just happened, Harry couldn’t tell. “Malfoy… what?” “You have to win this thing Potter, please, don’t go to him. He’ll do anything to get you alone.” Draco broke off, looking up into Harry’s eyes in despair. Harry couldn’t help himself and nodded, just wanting to get that look off Draco’s face. The last time he had seen him look so defeated had been in Myrtle’s bathroom. “Okay. I- I won’t.” Draco visibly relaxed, going limp, his hand falling to Harry’s wrist. Harry moved to hold Draco’s hand loosely. “Mal- Draco, I’m sorry. About Crabbe and, and for last year. I didn’t know what it would do to you, that it would… that you could have…” Draco watched him with wide eyes, shaking his head slightly. “Potter you idiot, why are you apologising? I was going to crucio you and you know it. So what if I could have died? I should have, at least then Dumbledore would still be here.” “Don’t say that! It matters to me Draco, please don’t” “Harry! As touching as this is, we _are_ in the middle of a battle with Voldemort.” Hermione cut Harry off, and the boys both turned to see her, Ron and Goyle watching them and looking more than a little confused. Harry nodded and pushed himself to his feet, bringing Draco with him by their linked hands.

“Hermione’s right. Draco, you need get somewhere safe. If any Death Eaters see you _not_ flinging curses at every student you see, they’ll go straight for you.” Draco looked about to protest, Harry could see both anger and fear in his eyes, so he held both his hands tightly. “ _Please_ Draco. I need to know you’ll be okay.” He whispered, and the blond nodded slowly before removing himself from Harry and grabbing Goyle’s arm, dragging him off through the castle. “And I thought _we_ had bad timing.” Ron muttered as Hermione shook her head with a sigh.

~

Harry was in Hagrid’s arms, doing everything he could to wait, wait for the right moment. The scream from McGonagall made his heart ache, the cries of Ginny and his best friends ripping right through him. But then Voldemort said a name, a name that he hadn’t stopped thinking about. “Draco, come.” He wanted more than anything to race across the courtyard then, to hold Draco back, but he didn’t have to. “Don’t move Malfoy. You’re here with us aren’t you?” Neville. Strong, brave, unwavering Neville. Voldemort and the other Death Eaters mocked his speech and Harry filled with pride for his friend, always standing up for what was right.

When Neville had finished, and the commotion started, Harry took the chance to roll deftly from Hagrid’s arms and running to the group of students, teachers and Order members gathered on the stone steps. He ran, without looking back to see Voldemort’s reaction, to his family, and they welcomed him with shouts of excitement and relief, with tears and confusion. Ron and Hermione were there to pull him into a tight hug, all three of them crying, and then Harry was pulled to the side by someone else. Before Harry could focus, a pair of lips were being crushed against his, and all Harry could taste was the salty tang of tears, but then the lips were gone and Harry looked down into the grey eyes of one Draco Malfoy, with tears endlessly running down his cheeks. “You stupid bastard Potter, you said you wouldn’t go!” The blond had his hands fisted in Harry’s top, pulling the taller boy in to kiss him again fiercely. The fighting had resumed again, and all around them people were running, hiding, firing hexes or sending up shields, but all Harry cared about was the small alcove Draco had pulled him into. He smiled slightly before pulling Draco in to hug him, both his arms wrapping around his waist, just as Draco had done earlier that day. “I’m glad you’re safe Draco. Get out of here if you can. Your mother, she saved me.” Draco’s breath hitched and Harry pulled back to press a firm kiss to Draco’s forehead. “I’ll find you after, okay? Just stay safe.” Before Draco could stop him, Harry stepped out of the alcove and into the fray, when the boy tugged at his arm again. “Potter you idiot, you might need something to fight with.” Harry looked down to see Draco holding out his wand to him, smiling wryly before they parted.

~

Harry didn’t know how long it had been since he had left Draco in the alcove, but he hoped it was long enough that him and his mother had made it to safety. Voldemort was dead, and his body had been moved to one end of the Great Hall, covered in black cloth. All Harry cared about was making sure his family and friends were okay. After quick glance at Ron and Hermione huddled together, not far from Molly and Ginny, and the rest of the Weasleys, Harry walked out of the hall. He didn’t know if Draco would still be in the castle, or the grounds, but he had told him he would find him when it was over. Harry had the sudden though of Hermione’s bag, and the Marauder’s Map that was hidden somewhere in it. He rushed back to his best friends, and after explaining to Hermione, she performed a quick accio and the map was in Harry’s hands.

It wasn’t difficult to find Draco, he’d had many times practice of searching for the boy’s name, and considering almost all other names were in one place, it took only a few seconds to spot the little banner floating on the grounds. Harry was instantly relieved to see that he was still at the castle, but then fear filled him. The name was by itself, and he couldn’t see Narcissa anywhere.  
  
The name wasn’t moving.  
  
For what felt like the hundredth time that night, Harry ran.

~

When he found Draco, the boy was laying on the ground, not far from Hagrid’s hut, remarkably close to where he had laughed about Buckbeak’s execution back in third year. Harry flung himself down next to Draco, reaching for his wrist to feel for a pulse, a small hysteric laugh escaping him when he found it, and Draco stirred, coughing up what must have been blood. “Potter?” Draco murmured, reaching for Harry, and the boy went readily. He moved to cup Draco’s face, pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead, in what seemed like a cruel mimic of their rushed moment earlier. “It’s okay Draco, I’m here. What happened? I told you to stay safe.” Draco smirked and laughed quietly. “Don’t remember, I was leaving with mother. I guess she made it out. That’s good.” He coughed again and groaned, his hand moving to his side, pulling it away again with a grimace. “That’s less good.” Harry looked down in alarm at the blood coating Draco’s hand, seeping through his shirt and onto the ground beneath them. “Draco! Oh fuck, no. No Draco, you’re gonna be alright.” Harry pulled off his jacket and pressed it Draco’s wound, ignoring the hiss of pain that brought from the blond. “It’s okay, Draco, it’s okay.” Harry kept talking, pulling Draco into his arms, not noticing the tears starting to fall down his cheeks until Draco lifted his clean hand to his face to brush them away. “Potter, don’t be an idiot.” Another cough brought up more blood, and Harry held Draco gently to him, a bloody hand leaving streaks through Draco’s hair.

“Did you kill him?” Draco whispered into Harry’s chest, and Harry let out a small sob as he nodded. “His spell backfired. He’s dead. So is Bellatrix. I’m sorry, I know she was your aunt-” “Merlin Potter, she was a bitch. You don’t need to apologise.” Harry held Draco closer to him, closing his eyes as the tears continued. “Don’t strain yourself Draco. You’ll get through this. I’ll make sure you do. I promise.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep… Harry.” Draco’s voice was gradually getting softer, with longer gaps between each word, and Harry’s breath caught in his throat at his next words. “I’m sorry, for everything… You never deserved any of it… Maybe you can forgive me, one day… I love you, Harry.” Draco slowly moved so that his arms were around Harry, reaching up to kiss his jaw before collapsing against his chest. “Draco… Draco please, no.” Harry couldn’t stop his tears even if he wanted to, holding Draco’s head again, trying to check the pulse point at his neck, but he knew. He knew it wouldn’t change anything. The boy pressed his lips to Draco’s forehead repeatedly, holding him close as sobs wracked his body. “I love you too Draco, darling, you’ll be okay now. Just rest. I- I’ve got you.” Harry spoke softly into Draco’s hair, laying on the ground with the sun setting around them, dreading the moment he would have to let go of the boy in his arms who had deserved so much more.


End file.
